Rather than get frustrated with an extrovert in your life that doesn’t understand you, work with your introvert strengths to help them. Being just you is the easiest way to do this. The next time you find yourself at an opposite end than that extrovert, quickly go into action being yourself.

First, listen. You’ve heard it before, it’s best to listen to understand and then to respond. And that is how the introvert listens anyway. Be comfortable with any silence that you need in conversation, and count on the extrovert to fill in the silent spots. Let them talk; and you listen.

Second, where ever it is that you are at odds with the extrovert, stop and find common interest. Let’s say it’s about going to a networking event that you don’t care much to do. Talk about your understanding of how important such events are to the success of your business. Again, if the extrovert wants to go on and on, let them. As the introvert your goal is to find a point of common agreement.

Third, don’t get distracted. It’s up to us more than the extrovert to maintain focus on the issue at hand. Continuing with the example, no matter what around you is happening get to the point in the conversation where you hear that point of agreement. You know you will if you are true to yourself: no need to gab right along.

Fourth, now you’ve found the agreement: compliment the extrovert on this. Acknowledge what you agree on, that you understand how they can do what they do so easily. Then talk about your ease in using another way to get to the same end. Explain what you would rather do and why.

You’re a master at listening. You get to use your strengths, including staying focused, so you are energizing yourself. You move toward getting to discuss in more detail why your preference is another way – and now the extrovert in your life understands you more.

If you want to know more about how to help those extroverts in your life understand you, while you just be you, please visit my new ebook page, Debunking Negative Introvert Myths. You'll find your key to success in your life being yourself, instead of trying to be like an extrovert.

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